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Thursday, May 15, 2014

A new talk sketched daily, by fan Stefani Bachetti

Fanfare

Bachetti-Ken-Robinson

TEDSketchNotes.Tumblr.com gives you Cliffs Notes to talks from speakers like Del Harvey, Ken Robinson, Andras Forgacs and Ed Yong, in sketchbook form. The passion project of Chicago-area designer Stefani Bachetti, what sets this Tumblr apart from other sketchnote spins on talks (see them from TEDGlobal 2011, TED2012, TED2013 and TED2014) is that a new image gets posted every weekday, more or less.

“I’ve been doing sketchnotes professionally on the side for a while, and teach the occasional workshop on it,” says Bachetti. “I’m always telling people interested in getting better to go watch a bunch of TED Talks to practice. I figured if I’m always telling people to go do it, maybe I should lead by example.”

Bachetti takes notes as she watches a talk, then spends an additional 10 to 15 minutes filling in color and shading. From there, she posts the image to Tumblr. “I’ve been trying to make sure there’s a blend of ‘classics’ and newer releases,” she says of her talk selections. “I do notice myself gravitating to videos with higher view counts. But certain topics just seem to lend themselves to being visualized.” 

While she’s posted many sketches so far, Bachetti can easily pick her favorite.

“It’s probably Mary Roach’s talk, ‘10 things you didn’t know about orgasm.’ I have read several of her books and think she’s hysterical. The mood of the sketch reflects both the dynamic nature of her talk, as well as my affinity for her in general,” says Bachetti. “I’m really excited by how the series is evolving. I started out being very structured with the layouts, but am starting to experiment more with each sketch. I’m seeing how to more clearly define the flow of each talk without losing playfulness.”

See a few of her sketchnotes below. And check out many more on TEDSketchNotes.Tumblr.com »

Bachetti-Del-Harvey Bachetti-Mary-Roach Bachetti-Andras-Forgacs

Are you a TED fan who remixes talks on paper, in music or on video? Write kate (at) ted (dot) com to have your work featured on the TED Blog. 


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Avoid Life Dramas With These Tips

Anytime I see any version of “no drama” on someone’s social media profile, I automatically assume they’re full of drama. You create your own drama in life, so, if you’re sick of life dramas, you’re doing it to yourself. Stop hitting yourself and take 10 steps toward a drama-free life.

I’m sure you know the exact way to fix everyone’s problems. You could single-handedly solve world hunger, bridge the income gap, and enact world peace. The reality is you have no idea what you’re talking about, and even if you do, nobody’s interested unless they’re directly asking you. Keep your advice to yourself, and you’ll avoid a lot of unnecessary drama.

People have a tendency to over-commit themselves. When you have too many commitments, you can’t focus everything you should on all of them. Things fall by the wayside, and you become a flake, no matter how hard you try. If you keep falling short of peoples’ expectations, they’ll all end up “against” you, and you’ll find yourself surrounded by drama.

It’s ok to socialize with people, but keep your nose out of other people’s business. If the treatment of whistle-blowers like Edward Snowden and Chelsea Manning have taught us anything, it’s people get overly dramatic when their secrets are leaked. Avoid the drama by minding your own business.

Lies are annoying – they fill your mind with all this extra gibberish. When you lie to people, you create your own unnecessary drama that could’ve easily been avoided. It’s a conscious choice you’re making to lie, and the lies will unravel sooner or later. Avoid the drama of covering the truth and the drama when it’s revealed you lied by speaking honestly.

If you’re focused on getting ahead in your goals, you won’t even notice the drama. You’ll be so zoned in on your own future all the side-drama just fades into the background. It becomes as important to you as the suffering of all those starving children in Africa and abused pets Sarah McLachlan sings about.

People will ask you a lot of questions. If you’re asked if you know something, deny it. Don’t try to say it in a way they know you know but can’t say so you feel important or special – just deny it. Don’t get involved. It’s that simple. And if someone you don’t want to talk to texts you with drama, don’t respond. They’ll get bored with it sooner or later.

I’m no gossip, but I heard Sandy tell John she overheard Bill and Katie talking about how Frank is. Gossip is a two-way street. It’s all well and good to tell everyone about how someone else gossips, but that makes you a gossip. The listener is a gossip, too. You don’t get to project your downfalls on others to absolve yourself from responsibility.

When you smile, you become the center of the room. You end up in the driver’s seat. If people come to you with drama, you can steer the conversation elsewhere. They’ll follow you because you seem more confident. If they don’t, you can confidently ignore them and walk away. No more drama.

A lot of so-called “drama” in life is really due to the way you’re reacting. People have problems, and sometimes they need to vent. Everyone vents, and you can be compassionate to all of them. It’s possible to listen to peoples’ problems as a courtesy. You don’t have to truly listen if you don’t want to, but at the very least give the impression that you are. It’s a temporary situation, and, if it’s that uncomfortable to you, you can avoid it the next time.

Life will always have drama – it’s unavoidable. Instead of letting it get to you, meditate. You’ll never find that fairy tale “happily ever after” life where everything is easy. The richest and poorest, youngest and oldest, biggest and smallest of us, have problems. The grass on both sides of the fence needs constant watering, weeding and mowing.

Suck it up…

Featured photo credit: clipart via clipartbest.com

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Brian Penny is a former business analyst at Countrywide and Bank of America under EVP Steve Ramsthel. In 2011, penny turned whistleblower, troll, Anonymous supporter, consultant, yogi, and freelance writer. He's a frequent contributor to Main Street, Huffington Post, and HardcoreDroid and an affiliate of Manduka and Amazon.


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Six Steps To Help You Conquer Stage Fright

Ever feel you’re not ready for the spotlight? Master your fears using these six steps to knock your performance outta the park! Stage fright (also known as performance anxiety) is not so difficult to overcome if you follow a few easy steps. These will work for any type of public speaking, from the board meeting presentation to Broadway. Follow the first three steps to get yourself ready, and the next three for the big night itself.

Do everything you can to prepare for your moment to shine. Memorize, rehearse, practice your presentation in front of your trusted friends: there’ll be less performance anxiety that way. If it’s a singing engagement, try practicing your song at a busy Karaoke bar. You’ll get all the crowd, without all of the pressure.

To overcome your stage fright, be sure to come up with performance goals for yourself. If you know you tend to sing louder at the end of your set, try singing louder at the start. If you want to slow down the pace of your presentation, then use a stopwatch while you practice. Performance goals can give you something to hone in on during rehearsal, and you can focus on your goals in your actual performance.

Have everything together when you practice, all of the materials you might need, notes, microphone, stool, musical instruments, and of course, bottled water. (You’ve got to stay hydrated!) And dress up when you rehearse! Nothing prepares you for the real deal like looking the part.

In order to ease your mind in preparing for public speaking, find effective ways to calm yourself. A lot can be said about taking time to relax. Honestly, even a worst-case-scenario of your performance wouldn’t involve a literal train wreck. Take it easy. Meditate. If you believe in a god, pray to her or him. Or just ask the muses to keep you inspired. Do anything you can to calm yourself down both offstage and just before you go onstage.

I’ve heard it said before if you picture an audience naked it can help you to perform. Now I can see how that might help you feel more confident, but it might also make you uncomfortable or give you the giggles. Here are a number of ways you can perceive the audience that will definitely help you to perform.

This is a biggie. This is probably the number one reason you experience stage fright. If you are afraid of a big audience, there are a number of things you can do. First, try to think of the whole audience as a unit. Or try to pick out a single member of the audience and deliver a good deal of your speech to that person. If there’s only one, it might be easier for you to perform to him or her.

Second, picture the whole audience is made up of only your friends and family. By thinking of people who love you and want the best for you, it will make the whole experience easier to swallow. Also, if you are performing for a low-lit room of people – use the darkness to your advantage! No need for eye contact.

A friend of mine had a very different suggestion: “If you have to perform for a large audience, picture them as a bunch of cattle. At any event, there will be people who don’t even want to be there: some preoccupied with themselves, others on their phones. You don’t have to perform for them. And you can’t please everyone, so don’t worry about stage fright.” By depersonalizing the audience, you can compartmentalize them. If your performance isn’t such an extravaganza, it may be easier for you to overcome your performance anxiety. Remember to do these next few steps as you perform.

Right before the show starts, you may be nervous, but remember you have all the control. You can get ready for it and ultimately, the pacing is up to you. And you can do the entire show just for yourself if you want to. Maybe the audience isn’t even there. (In that case, no need to have stage fright at all.)

You can pray again, or meditate before everything starts. Some actors sit in their trailers and do acting exercises before they begin. All of your preparedness will kick in again here. Be sure to have all of your materials at hand again: your costumes, your instruments, your water. These can be your last minute comforts before you grace the stage with your presence. Remember the scout motto: Be prepared.

Once the show starts, you have to go through with it. This might not sound comforting at first, but it’s as helpful as it is true. You will have less and less stage fright as the show goes on, because you know it’s coming to a close. Therefore, once it’s underway you’ve only got to wait it out. So embrace it — Dive right in!

Also, a mistake is only a bad thing if you make it that way. Many performers practice a technique called “railroading.” When you make a mistake, don’t draw any attention to it. An acting teacher once told me: “The audience is pretty clueless. They’re not going to notice your mistakes unless you make them a big deal. You will notice your mistakes because you have the script memorized and you’ve rehearsed it perfectly a hundred times. But they don’t know your lines. And they won’t see you walked the wrong way, instead of the way you rehearsed it. So, if you make a mistake, just keep on going.”

As the show goes on, keep focused on the performance goals you practiced. And remember to tell the story: if you get caught up in the story, you might forget you were nervous in the first place!

Sure, it’s easier said than done. Why not distract yourself a little in the hours before you go onstage? Or, you can just focus on the work. You only have to perform exactly what you rehearse. You only have to do what you’ve done before. It’s not brain surgery.

Sometimes all you have to do is give it a try to gain confidence. You could try pretending you aren’t really nervous. Sometimes the act of pretending can have a placebo effect on you — and suddenly you’re no longer nervous at all. Maybe you could imagine you are an alien with a secret message for all of humankind. Hey, it worked for Ziggy Stardust…

Even the greatest public speakers still experience stage fright, but they’ve been able to minimize it using techniques just like these. Just remember the more shows you do, the simpler it gets. You will gain confidence as you go, and you will have memories to draw upon, reminding you performance anxiety really is no big deal. Let experience be your performance teacher, and it will get easier and easier.

Featured photo credit: Public_speaking/ProjectManhattan via upload.wikimedia.org

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Christopher Schoonover searches for the chocolatey-sublime innards of reality. There, he believes he will find some profound truth that he can share with others in the form of a short story or a poem. In the past, he wrote a free novel called Don't Read. Nowadays, he is working on an LA creative nonfiction piece with his co-writer, Melissa Sweat. After moving out of the big city hustle, he now embraces the peaceful desert life of Joshua Tree, California.


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Confidence in Your Business

The urgent desire for a successful business, and the fear of losing business, drives many a good person to do sleazy things.

I’m not talking about casino owners or pimps or politicians or corporations. I’m talking about good small business owners who become marketers.

Let’s say you have a blog, and you write good stuff, and people like it. Now what? How do you build that into a business?

Maybe you see people who’ve made millions online: How did they do it? Internet marketing. They built mailing lists, then manipulated those lists through emotional tactics, social proof, creating false urgency, building funnels, warming up the lists, making the potential customers think they need this or they’ll fail.

You see this success and all of a sudden you want it. You don’t know how to build a business, but this guy did it and he is successful. So you buy his course, and follow his advice.

All of a sudden, your excellent blog is pushing me to join a mailing list to get a free report. There’s a popup trying to get me to enter my email address. If I do, I start to get all kinds of emails I don’t want, trying to push me into a funnel. You post a thousand things to social media trying to get me interested in your sale.

You start to create an image you think I want, so I’ll buy what you’re selling. You’re now a marketer, a manipulator, untrustworthy.

I hit Unsubscribe.

What if, instead, you had confidence in your business? You created something of value and believed it would help people? You made its value and how much it helps people your metrics.

You’d do none of those things. All you’d do is create great things, and people would spread the word for you. You’d opt for simplicity and trustworthiness.

You build confidence by putting everything you have into what you’re building. By listening to people and seeing whether what you’re doing is helping, resonating. Adjusting if needed. Those who don’t come to you … you let go. What you’re building isn’t for everyone.

The fear of losing business will always be there to some extent, but don’t be driven by it.


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7 Ways To Sneak In Exercises When You Don’t Really Have Time

We all know exercise is important. It keeps us healthy and in shape. But it’s also a big time commitment to keep up a steady exercise routine. It can also be hard to make yourself work out if you’re really not in the mood. Luckily, there are tons of ways we can stay fit and burn calories without having to schedule a long gym session. At home, at work, watching television, these exercises can be done without taking up a big chunk of our time or our energy. Here are our top seven ways to sneak exercise in to your day:

Stairs are a great calorie-burner, and they also tone your legs and bum. Next time you’re facing the elevator-or-stairs dilemma, take the stairs. Walking up them will do the trick, but try going up at a job to increase your heart rate and burn a few extra calories. Next time you’re faced with an escalator ride, consider walking up instead of standing still on one step.

Picking a parking spot near the back of the lot forces you to get out and walk to your destination. It’s a little change, but over time it can make a big difference. Consider doing this at the supermarket or mall. That way, you’ll have to walk in from farther away, but you’ll also have to walk out with heavy bags. It’s a small step towards sneaking in some exercise.

These large inflatable balls are great alternatives to traditional office chairs. Sitting on an exercise ball all day works your core because you’re constantly trying to balance — but you don’t even notice! The movements are so slight that you’ll feel perfectly secure and comfortable on the exercise ball, but your abdominal muscles will be working to keep you stable. If you’re feeling particularly energetic, this is also a good way to get in some crunches at the office. Lay with the middle of your back on the exercise ball and your feet planted firmly on the ground. Crunch up and lower yourself down slowly and in a controlled motion.

Tapping or moving one of your legs is a good way to burn a few extra calories throughout the day without putting in a lot of effort. Try to switch legs from time to time to give one a rest. You can also cross your legs and jiggle one foot for less movement with the same result. Just make sure you’re not doing it in a meeting to avoid seeming nervous or anxious.

Sitting down all day can get pretty old pretty fast. Stand up occasionally and balance on one leg, and then the other. It’ll get your blood flowing and help you strengthen your core muscles. Try to increase the time you are able to balance on one leg each time you do it.

Many people enjoy hobbies that are active, such as biking, hiking or kayaking. Find an outdoor activity that you enjoy. If you’re really having fun, you won’t even notice that you’re getting in a serious workout in the process. These activities are also great ways to meet new people and make friends. See if there are any groups or clubs in your area that you can join.

If you are standing somewhere for an extended period of time, like when washing the dishes, try slowly raising and lowering yourself on your tiptoes. It works your calves and is easy to do pretty much anywhere.

Featured photo credit: Jaymie Koroluk via flickr.com

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Maggie is a journalism student/writer-from-home. She currently writes for Table Matters, Lifehack, and The Triangle. Her interests include reading, decorating cakes, and, depending on her mood, running. Check out her portfolio at maggieheath.com.


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Research Digest #3: Getting to grips with implicit bias

My third and final post at the BPS Research Digest is now up: Getting to grips with implicit bias. Here’s the intro:

Implicit attitudes are one of the hottest topics in social psychology. Now a massive new study directly compares methods for changing them. The results are both good and bad for those who believe that some part of prejudice is our automatic, uncontrollable, reactions to different social groups.

All three studies I covered (#1, #2, #3) use large behavioural datasets, something I’m particularly keen on in my own work.

Link:  Getting to grips with implicit bias


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Wednesday, May 14, 2014

How To Live a Life That Is Uniquely Yours

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The biggest mistake people make in life is that they pursue dreams and goals without taking the time to discover what they are truly passionate about, and then allowing their dreams to unfold naturally as an expression of their passion and who they really are.

If you are doing something under the impression that you will be happy once you achieve this or that, or that you’ll love your job when you get that promotion, but not right now, then you are mistaken. Your happiness and your wealth (in the truest sense of the term) is determined by how you feel now, not by how you will feel when you achieve your goals.

When you make your happiness reliant on a potential future, all that you are doing is creating barriers in this moment from you being happy, being at peace, and thus being as effective and productive as you can be while working towards your goals.

If you are not in love with what you are doing, how can you reasonably assume that somehow you will fall in love with what you are doing later, much less be fulfilled by it?

The only way to a life of passion, happiness, and purpose that is uniquely your own and expression of who you really are, is to go from the inside out.

1. Follow Your Heart. There are people who say that it is a lie to tell people that they can achieve anything they set their minds on.

I agree.

But what is not a lie is that you can achieve anything that you set your mind and your heart on. When you can wholeheartedly do something, you do it with passion and enthusiasm. Moreover, whatever your heart is guiding you to do is the truth of who you are, and what you need to be doing.

To follow your heart, just start doing what you love to do. It doesn’t matter what it is, the more you try things and search within yourself for what you really love, eventually you will find it. Don’t just start picking new career options because you think that they are what you want, or because they appear to provide the lifestyle you want.

Live the life that you want now by doing more of what you love. Cultivate love by doing the things that you really love to do and you will be following your heart. Eventually that passion that you feel for what you are doing will find a way all by itself to create the life that you wanted to live all along.
If you are thinking about your family and your children and that you must provide for them, remember that they will respect a parent more who is filled with love and enthusiasm because they have the courage to do what they love every day, than a parent who provides all the financial means in the world but who is devoid of that love and passion which makes us human.

It is a preconception that you can’t earn a living doing what you love. And, it’s not true. There is always a way so don’t let your mind defeat you and distract you from following your passion. That doubt is the one thing that is keeping you from experiencing the true abundance, security, and freedom that comes from doing what you really love to do.

“Don’t need tools I’ve got my heart.” – Jack Johnson

2. Follow Your Curiosity. While following your heart gives you direction towards your passion and purpose in life, following your curiosity provides the foundation of knowledge for you to make your dreams reality.

By choosing to follow our heart and our curiosity we are deliberately choosing to leave behind our limiting beliefs and ideas of ourselves, and step into unlimited potential. We are choosing consciously to change our level of awareness by literally choosing a whole new way of being. Our curiosity is a manifestation of a deeper aspect of ourselves that is trying to surface, which includes with it the talents, abilities, potential and passion you never knew you had.

Follow your curiosity fluidly and you will expand your mind and you will grow exactly in the way that you need to be growing, and you will learn all that you need to learn because you will be tapping into a greater, unfathomable aspect of yourself and creation which will guide you perfectly to where you need to go. As Steve Jobs said in his Stanford commencement address:
“Much of what I stumbled into by following my curiosity and intuition turned out to be priceless later on.”

3. Never stop learning. If you followed the first two steps, then not only will you be absolutely fascinated by what you are doing with your life and what you are learning, but you will also love it immensely and be irrationally passionate and enthusiastic about it.

Fascination, curiosity, enthusiasm, passion: these are all essential qualities for success.

If you followed the first two steps then it will be easy to never stop learning because you will be exhilarated by what you are doing! What more could we ask for as human beings than to be filled with curiosity and fascination every day while doing what we love? The more you learn the more you grow, and the more that you learn in alignment with your dreams, the more powerful you become at what you do.

“Power rests on the kind of knowledge that one holds. What is the sense of knowing things that are useless? They will not prepare us for our unavoidable encounter with the unknown.” – Don Juan

4. Simplify, simplify, simplify. The less time you spend doing things you don’t want to do, the more time you have to spend doing what you love to do.
Sometimes I think that this is the key to life.

Most people spend their time thinking thoughts that don’t make them happy and which don’t produce uncontrollable feelings of love, or they do things they don’t like to do out of some form of obligation, or work at job they don’t like to make ends meet, and so on.

What we really need is time. There is more than enough time in the day for all our passions and dreams and family time to co-exist perfectly but we waste it doing things we don’t love to do!

If you really want to change your life, take the risk and start cutting out all those things you do that you know don’t make you happy, but which you think you have to be doing. I’m going to let you in on a little secret. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. And when you stop doing those things, you’re free.

Simplify not only how you think, and what you do, but also simplify your purpose and your dream. The more focused your dream becomes, the more definite it becomes. Instead of reading 3 books at a time on your subject, read one book wholeheartedly. Put some of your other passions aside for a while and focus on the one that fills you with energy and enthusiasm. See if you don’t actually enjoy it a little more when you don’t have to stress about fitting all those other things into your day.

“It’s not the daily increase but daily decrease. Hack away at the unessential.” – Bruce Lee

5. Be persistent. In many ways life is a lot like meditation. Perhaps that is why meditation is the key to life, and the key to unlocking your potential. In meditation, it doesn’t matter how many times you are distracted by your thoughts and become involved in them, what counts is how many times you bring yourself back to the silence between your thoughts.

If you can persistently bring yourself back when you get distracted, you will make progress until eventually your thoughts only crop up occasionally, or not at all. It is inevitable with practice. Just like the realization of your dreams will be with persistence. It doesn’t matter how many times you appear to fail, or how many times you lose focus. Everyone makes mistakes. It is part of life, and it is part of learning.

If you are doing what you love every day, if you are always learning, and if you are always following your curiosity, then you will always be growing and it will be nearly impossible to feel like you have failed … ever.

Failure can only exist when we have not learned from our mistakes. Yet as soon as you do learn from mistakes, with the gift of hindsight you will discover for yourself that your whole life was somehow orchestrated perfectly to get you to where you are now.

Be persistent in doing what you love and following your dreams and never will you regret a moment of your life, and if you can stick with them when things get difficult, as they always do, or when doubt creeps in, if you can stay steadfast in the course you have set for yourself you will meet with success.

Michael Jordan hit the most game-winning shots for his team in the whole history if the NBA, but what most people don’t know is that he also missed more game-winning shots than anyone else in the history of the NBA. In the words of Josh Waitzkin, “What made him the greatest was not perfection, but a willingness to put himself on the line as a way of life.”

Put yourself on the line, and see for yourself what you can become when you learn to deal with failure, but stay persistent in your commitment to you dreams, and maintain integrity in your expression of who you really are.

7. Meditate. I was going to put the last step as believing in yourself, but I chose not to because when it comes down to it, meditation is more important.

Don’t get me wrong, believing in yourself is absolutely essential. But the best way to believe in yourself is to experience your infinite potential, your power, your creativity, and your life purpose directly. And that is where meditation comes in.

When you learn how to get into the gap between your thoughts, something truly amazing happens. You feel the boundaries of who you thought you were begin to dissolve and fall away, and you experience yourself as something truly pure … and powerful.

Pure energy, consciousness, spirit, love, power, potential, whatever you want to call it, for it makes no difference. The point is that when you start to enter that awareness, that space between your thoughts more frequently, you start to center yourself in a place where nothing can ever go wrong and where you realize that you are perfect and complete in every way.

If you want to experience your true power directly, then meditate. Not only will you experience what you are capable of as you learn to identify with the infinite potential of the space between your thoughts instead of your thoughts themselves, but you will also discover who you are and thus become more attuned to what you love doing, what you’re curious about, and so on.

Then not only will you know that you are magnificent, but you will be able to experience that magnificence any time you want to, and channel it into all that you do.

Conclusion
Follow these steps, embody them, become them, and happiness will be your way, and you will be able to achieve anything and get exactly what you want in life, because you will become exactly what you always wanted to be.

.

Brandon West is the creator of Project Global Awakening. A website dedicated to the research of a variety of scientific and spiritual disciplines, and applying that knowledge to help you live an inspi


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Before You Quit Your Job – Ask Yourself These 5 Things

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It’s no mystery that most people are unsatisfied in their jobs. Statistics show that more than 70% of the U.S. workforce is unhappy with their current jobs.
Why is this happening in this great and free country? Don’t we ALL have more resources and opportunity than any other place on Earth? If so, why are we all sitting around complaining about our miserable jobs? There are many answers to this question of course, but I think that the most pressing ones are:
• We have allowed ourselves to become dependent on easy money.

What I mean by easy money is that our society tells us that it’s okay to push papers around our desks for 8 hours a day and collect a paycheck for it.

• We are becoming more aware by the day to the fact that there is unlimited opportunity to create the life we want and justly deserve. The “passion” movement, which states that we are able to earn a living following our passions and doing what we love is becoming a common theme. More and more people are starting to believe that there is more to life than wasting away in a job they hate.
One problem is that most of us are not rewarded for outstanding productivity, but rather on the hours we log. It’s a completely flawed system that breeds laziness, inaction, manipulation, and greed.
We are not taught to pursue our dreams but instead we are told that we need to be realistic. We are raised to follow a set of preordained guidelines that lead to a life of mediocraty, not excellence. It simply does not make any sense.
If you want to quit your job, and Lord knows most of us do, then you really need to ask yourself these questions. The key here is being honest with yourself. Failing to answer these questions completely honestly may result in putting yourself in a worse position.
Ask yourself these 5 questions:
1. Why do I want to quit? This sound simple, yet most of us don’t know the real reason why we feel the need to quit. Maybe we are just bored and the answer is working on a different project. Maybe we hate a specific coworker and if they left, we would be fine. And maybe we are just stuck in a rut and all we need is some valuable time away to clear our heads.
Most of you can make yourselves be happy at work by staying positive, doing a great job, and rising up the corporate ladder. But some of you can’t. Some of you know deep down that your job is wrong for you.
If the job is truly something that is wrong for you and/or goes against your morals, then you may have a valid reason. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m all for pursuing your passion in place of staying at a dreadfully boring job, but don’t jump ship at the first sign of discontentment.
2. What do I want to do instead? Do you want another job? Will you be happy doing something similar? Is your current field challenging and/or stimulating. Are you actually interested in your current line of work?
Do not make the mistake of quitting your job because you simply cannot handle it any longer only to find yourself scrambling to find any job because you’re running out of money. Chances are, you’ll end up right back where you started. The only difference will be that you now work for a new company and have to start at the bottom of the rung again.
3. Can I afford to quit? If you don’t have another job lined up, you better know for certain that you can manage to pay your bills if you cannot find another job right away. This is the biggest reason that people don’t quit-they’re scared to death that they won’t be able to pay their bills. And while this is a very valid concern, it’s also a trap that can keep you stuck in a lifelong grind of misery.

Quitting a job, especially one you’ve had for a long time, is extremely scary. If you are uncertain about your ability to cover your living expenses, you have two choices:

Craft a detailed cash flow worksheet and find out exactly how much money you have versus how much money you will need to cover your expenses based on being without a job. The general rule of thumb is to have 3-6 months of cash reserves in place.Hustle your butt off. If you absolutely cannot stand one more second at your soul sucking job and feel as though you must quit, then be prepared to hustle like you’ve never hustled before.
You will have to get creative with your finances for sure. Selling old stuff, doing odd jobs, creating a side business, and generally getting uncomfortable will all be part of the process if you choose option 2.

For many for you, the thought of all of that is too much to bear and will keep you in your jobs. For others, the risk of leaving a secure job in order to pursue something that means something to them will be tolerable and worth the risk.
4. Will I be happy working for someone else? Some of you are entrepreneurs trapped in a cubicle. Are you one of them? If so, you may never be happy working for the man. You need to be “the man”. Hopping from job to job thinking there’s something wrong with them is often the result of having the entrepreneurial mindset.
5. What don’t I like about my job? Write out a checklist of all the things you dislike about your current job. Is it the pay? Is it your arrogant boss? Is it the lack of flexibility? Make sure you know exactly what you don’t want in your next job and then spend as much time necessary finding a job that meets your criteria. Are you ever going to find the “perfect” job? Probably not, but you can find one that will keep you happy for a while.
And if you don’t go the job route, why not create a business that will allow you to enjoy the things you value most?
Taking the Plunge
There is no doubt about it that quitting your job is scary. The mere thought of it may have many of you shaking in your chairs. Much of the fear can be removed by answering the above questions and truly understanding what it is you want in a career and then carefully planning to go get it.

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Steve Roy is the owner of EndingTheGrind.com, a blog about escaping the daily grind of a 9 to 5 job, building an online business, and living your passions.You can also find him on Twitter at @EndGrind


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The Reality of This Moment

As you sit here reading this, pause and expand your awareness beyond your computer/phone … what is the reality of this moment?

You’re reading, and there are a bunch of other tasks you want to do on your computer, yes … but there’s also your body. How does that feel? There’s the area around you, perhaps some people around you. There’s nature nearby.

Take a pause to become aware of the actual reality of this particular moment.

As we go through our day, we’re often stressed because of all the things we have to do, the things we’re not doing. We worry about how things will go in the future, and procrastinate because we’re afraid of an overwhelming task. We feel we’re not good enough, we compare ourselves to others, we fall short of some ideal. We replay a conversation that already happened.

That’s all in our heads, but it’s all fantasy. The reality of this specific moment is that you’re OK. Better than OK, actually: there are so many good things to be grateful for, in this moment.

And there are the particulars of the moment that only exist, right now. The combination of sounds and colors and shapes and smells around you will never exist in this particular combination ever again. The way your body feels, the thought that pops into your head in the next moment, will never exist again, ever.

You yourself are changing all the time. We think of ourselves as one unchanging entity, but the self that you are right now is different than the one you were before you read this article. And that was different than the one who woke up this morning, because various things interacted with you to change you in small (or large) ways.

So the you that exists right now will change in a moment, from interacting with the particulars of the next moment. The you that exists right now will never exist again.

This is the ever-changing, impermanent nature of you. And in truth, every single thing around you is changing all the time, sometimes in less obvious ways. Everyone around you is changing. Each moment is a fluid snapshot of impermanent changing entities, interacting with each other.

That’s the reality of this moment. Don’t miss it.

And this awareness is available to you all the time. Throughout the day, as you start to worry and get lost in your tasks, ask yourself, “What’s the reality of this moment?”


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Explorer Steve Boyes takes us on an epic journey to save Africa’s last remaining wetland wilderness

Fellows Friday

Blog_FF-SteveBoyes

Steve Boyes is passionately devoted to the preservation of wilderness, as well as to restoring and protecting species and landscapes already damaged by human intervention. At TED2014, the ornithologist and National Geographic Emerging Explorer spoke to the TED Blog about his work to save South Africa’s endangered Cape parrot and his campaign to get the Okavango Delta listed as a UNESCO World Heritage site. Oh, and he also walked us through the profound experience of being a tiny human in the midst of Earth’s primordial wilderness. Below, an edited transcript of our conversation.

Why is wilderness important?

Wilderness cannot be restored or recreated—only destroyed. We are about to lose the last glimpses into prehistory that connect us to a time before modern man. By wilderness, I mean places untouched by modern society that are capable of completely taking you away, bringing you to tears, making you feel spiritual — all of those things that people go into nature to find. I firmly believe that in the next two decades, humans will lose our last true wilderness areas if we do not focus on preserving them.

My long-term research and expeditions focus on the future of the Okavango Delta — Africa’s last-remaining wetland wilderness, located in northern Botswana. This untouched 18,000 square kilometer alluvial fan is the largest of its kind, and is supplied by the world’s largest undeveloped river catchment — the mighty Kavango Basin. The Okavango Delta is home to the largest-remaining elephant population and keystone populations of lion, hyena, giraffe and lechwe antelopes. It’s the size of Texas, and visible from space.

Every year, my team and I pole ourselves in dugout canoes — called  “mekoro” — across the Okavango Delta, guided by baYei people, who have lived in harmony with this environment for hundreds of years. Accessing the central wilderness of the delta takes eight days, and the baYei’s mekoro are the only craft that can get us there. Twenty years ago, the journey would’ve taken two hours in a boat out of the only nearby town, Maun. It’s an indicator of how far the wilderness area has retreated.

These 340-kilometer research expeditions take us 15 to 18 days through the unexplored central wilderness. It’s a scientific investigation — we are establishing baselines for biodiversity so that we have a point of reference when things change, as they inevitably will. This pristine delta and river are threatened by irrigation schemes, agricultural development, hunting, overfishing, mining exploration, poaching, tourism and population increase, all of which have already had an impact.

The Okavango Delta expedition team poles across the vast wetland by the only possible form of transport, a dugout canoe called a mekoro. Photo: Wild Bird Trust The Okavango Delta expedition team cross the vast wetland in the only possible form of transportation, a dugout canoe called a “mekoro.” Photo: Wild Bird Trust

You are an orthinologist, so your first love is birds, right? What is the link between your study of birds and your work preserving the Okavango Delta?

Put simply, birds can choose with their wings. When things go wrong in an ecosystem, they will simply not return. One of our projects in the Okavango Delta is the Okavango Wetland Bird Survey. It is a broad-based biodiversity survey that focuses on birds as bioindicators of significant change in the water and islands of the Okavango. You’ll see all the storks come in, check it out, go hmm, and go somewhere else — and maybe die in the process. But they’ll leave. It’s almost instant. One year they’re there, and the next year they’re gone.

As for how I got to the Okavango in the first place—I did my Ph.D. on the Meyer’s parrot, which thrives there. The Meyer’s parrot is the most abundant, widespread parrot in Africa, with massive distribution and six subspecies. It’s a highly successful parrot and typically lives in remote river valleys throughout the African subtropics. It’s a close relative of the South African Cape parrot — which is, in contrast, Africa’s most endangered parrot. Yet we knew nothing about the Meyer’s parrot. I wanted to help the Cape Parrot, so I went to the Okavango to learn the Meyer’s parrot’s secrets as to why it’s so successful. I’ll tell you one:  Meyer’s parrots are the only hole-nesting birds that breed in winter in the Okavango Delta, because they are the only animal that feeds on an abundant supply of insect larvae pupating in seed pods. I wanted to learn things like this, to take to the Cape parrot and try and create context for them.

The Wild Bird Trust works to restore the population and forest habitat of South Africa's endemic and endangered Cape parrot. Photo: Wild Bird Trust The Wild Bird Trust works to restore the population and forest habitat of South Africa’s endangered Cape parrot. Photo: Wild Bird Trust

When I’m not in the Okavango Delta, I’m back in South Africa working on the iziKhwenene Project — iziKhwenene means “Cape parrots” in isiXhosa. We work with local communities of the Amathole Mountains, teaching people how to rehabilitate the forest ecosystem that the birds rely on. Together, we are restoring Afromontane forest patches by planting thousands of indigenous trees and creating protected areas. We also support Cape parrots by administering vaccines, building nest boxes and offering supplementary food. Rebuilding destroyed forest requires the participation of local communities over generations. So we are establishing a conservation culture, capturing the imaginations of local children and providing jobs for their parents. And it has worked: once the Cape parrot was never mentioned, but it is now widely known in South Africa, especially in the villages below the Amathole Mountains. Local community members now shout “iziKhwenene” in joy as we drive past in one of the project vehicles.

Together, the iziKhwenene Project and the work in the Okavango Delta grew and grew until we needed to establish the Wild Bird Trust in 2009. We want to use endangered bird species as ambassadors for threatened ecosystems. So, it is really all about birds and people. We cannot exist one without the other.

Your tales of visiting the Okavango Delta are thrilling. Tell us more about the experience. Who goes with you?

We have two research camps, which we visit seasonally. One’s testing nest boxes, so we learn about what Meyer’s parrots need and can take this information to the Cape Parrots and their nest boxes. The other one is focused on wetland birds. This camp is more accessible and can accommodate volunteers and scientists. There are three camp managers, who cook and so on, that travel with us. Each year, we also do a crossing of the delta to which we add one writer, one filmmaker and one blogger.

I believe that one of the key things we need to do to preserve wilderness is to convince millions of people around the world to protect landscapes and wilderness areas they’ll never visit, because they simply can’t. We want to share our experiences, so they know these places exist and are important. The Into the Okavango website, an open-access site where we upload and track data in real-time during our journey, allows the world to follow us and experience what we’re experiencing firsthand. It’s about inspiration.

We have a core group of outdoorsman and scientists that engineer their annual calendars to accommodate these annual expeditions across the Okavango Delta. We will all continue doing this for the foreseeable future.

Surrounded by wildlife in the Okavango Delta. Photo: Wild Bird Trust Surrounded by wildlife in the Okavango Delta. Photo: Wild Bird Trust

Aren’t these people afraid to enter such wilderness? What’s it like?

Often production people don’t have any wilderness background, but I’ve guided for 15 years. I know how to take care of people in the wilderness, and how to support a wilderness experience. When I take you, I’m going to prepare you with a lot of talking around the fire. For example, you’ll have to be a vegetarian the whole time. You will have the bare minimum of gear — no possessions. From the first day, when you get out into the landscape, you’ll be on the water—at one with nature—exposed for three weeks.

Every day on expedition we have to be off the water by 4 o’clock, because we typically use hippo paths to travel by day—the hippos use them at night. So well before sunset we’re out of the water and setting up camp. You set your tent up. I say, “I’m going to give you a little three-legged stool. You can take a notebook with you, you can take binoculars, a bird book, a little flask of whiskey or tea, whatever you want. And you’re going to walk off, and you tell me where you’re going.” You walk and open yourself to the reality of this place. You must feel and recognize the anxiety building inside you. When it becomes too much to go any further — it could be 10 meters, it could be 100 meters, it’s up to you — you must stop. Find a place up against a tree, on a termite mound. Put your things down. And you sit. You’ve seen all kinds of wildlife that day and now, in this remote place, there are ultimate consequences — we must be all very aware of that. I’ve got a great medical kit and am qualified as a caregiver, but I’m not a medical doctor. We’ve got medical evacuation support: a helicopter could be here in the daytime, within an hour or two, but at night you’re on your own for 12 hours. So you can’t take any risks, and I’m very clear about that. I say, “You’re going to start to see the sun setting—that’s the next source of anxiety. It’s going to build and build until it gets too scary and you cannot handle it anymore. At that point, you walk back to the fire.”

Huddled around the campfire. Photo: Wild Bird Trust Huddled around the campfire. Photo: Wild Bird Trust

That’s the process of linking a person into that wilderness experience, into the reality of that place they’re in and into themselves. You just sit there quietly and listen. Don’t focus on that feeling of anxiety, just be mindful of it, because it’s telling you when you must go. These are powerful experiences for people, where they get in touch with their own survival instinct speaking to them, as well as a landscape. That can teach you — it is a bit of a cliché — how small you are.

Once you’ve gone through eight days of that, you’ve arrived — it is literally a wonderland, a wilderness beyond comparison. It is thousands of birds, it is hundreds of elephants, it is so many lions at night that you don’t know what to do. They are everywhere. So many hippos. You’ll have a clan of 50 hyenas come at some point in the night, running around the camp, trying to see what is going on. They’re very inquisitive animals that inspect and break everything in a matter of minutes.

How do you protect yourself from the lions and hyenas and elephants?

Don’t need to. They have no interest in human beings. You just have to be a calm, normal human, and these animals do not consider you prey — they’re very scared of you. It’s just if you are drunk, or trying to hurt them, or doing something odd. These animals know that human beings are the most dangerous thing they’re ever going to see in the wilderness, and they’ve known that for 100,000 years. You just respect all wildlife, and you’re safe. Live mindfully and live calm — you’ll be safe.

When we first accessed this wilderness, it hadn’t been seen for 60 years. It had been cut off from the world. And before that, people had only really visited it for another 60 years. Before that, not one human being had been in there. It’d have been impossible, the technology didn’t exist. The first time we got in there, there was a small group — about four of us. Everyone had gone off to do their walkabouts. They were all sitting somewhere; I didn’t know where they were. These two elephant herds — bachelor herds — come onto the small island and they’re [makes growling/roaring sounds] hitting the palms. Chaos ensues. Dust going up. And then I see — doop! — like meercats: my brother’s up, Giles is up, Pete’s up, I’m up. This was the first time on the expedition that I knew exactly where they were sitting. I was sitting under a sausage tree completely overwhelmed by this place.

Elephants at sunset. Photo: Wild Bird Trust Elephants at sunset. Photo: Wild Bird Trust

I wanted to know what they were feeling after discovering this place for themselves. So I went to speak to each of them and—whispering, like we were in a church—asked, “Well, what do you think?” Every single one of them just cried, and cried, and cried. And I cried with him, and I cried with the next guy. Because it was just —  you try to say something about an elephant, or you try to say something about a lion, but you cry. It’s happened many times since.

That’s what we might lose—these places. There’s no doubt in my mind that true wilderness is the birthplace of all religion. It’s where Muhammad, Moses, Jesus — they all went into the deserts, the mountain, and they sat quietly. It’s exactly like I make people do. If we lose that, we will lose the secrets that those guys were given, whether it’s on a tablet or in a book. Those were important secrets that helped societies continue for thousands of years. We need to be able to sit silently in the wilderness to listen to the universe and ourselves.

Buddha under the tree?

Yes. I believe that in the next few decades we’ll lose that tree, those last wild places. There’s not much left. Meditation is our only hope after the last wilderness goes. I don’t meditate, perhaps because I am addicted to wild places that bring me into that state instantly.

But the “wild” is not only found in remote, faraway places. In many of my talks about wilderness, I’ll say, “Picture yourself. You’re sitting at home, reading a book in your favorite room. It’s late at night and you’re calm. The lights suddenly go out. It’s pitch dark. The hum of the refrigerator down the hall  that you rarely hear, but was always there, is gone. It’s that eerie silence. That’s the ‘wildness’ saying, ‘I am here. I am never going to go away. You just need to be quiet to see, feel and hear me.’”

Our planet will die and all will go gray if we lose our connection to true “wildness.” It’s always there. It’s the fabric of the universe. That’s what we must tune ourselves into. It’s overwhelming, and direct, and fluid in the wilderness. But come home and you will find it in the park, in your favorite river, that hike you love, the pond your kids play in. One of the best places to experience it is swimming in the ocean, feeling that anxiety and wonder building.

Above: watch a trailer for the upcoming feature documentary Okavango, which folllows Steve Boyes and his team of explorers on their epic journey into the primordial wilderness of Botswana’s Okavango Delta. Their mission: to ensure the preservation of Africa’s last-remaining wetland wilderness.

During the next couple of years, you’ll be filming a feature documentary on the Okavango Delta, in partnership with National Geographic. What is your aim for this film?

We believe that the only way to save the Okavango Delta is by building a global movement to preserve the Kavango Basin as a multinational UNESCO World Heritage Site. The documentary is in service to that goal. In 2015, we will undertake a 3-month, 2,200 kilometer expedition down the length of the Okavango River in dug-out canoes. It’s not just about the adventure: the research data that will be generated by our team of experts — a botanist, zoologist, ichthyologist, herpetologist, ornithologist and sociologist — will provide the maps and media to motivate the establishment of the first protected areas in the catchment. As we travel, we will also share this impossible expedition down the world’s wildest river live with the world like never before, through the Into the Okavango website. We need to whole world to want to care about preserving the Okavango Delta, just to reserve the opportunity to one day visit this primordial wilderness.

Greeting the wild. Photo: Wild Bird Trust Greeting the wild. Photo: Wild Bird Trust

How do you live? When you’re not out in the delta, are you in an urban area?

I live on a 25-acre property in Hogsback Village on Hogsback Mountain in the Amathole Mountains, where we run the iziKhwenene Project. About 80 people live there. My wife, newborn son and I live a normal life with television and iPods. We love community life and being able to work for a landscape and a species. When Jack gets older, we will move back to Cape Town to give him every opportunity to be who he wants to be.

More than half the world’s population now lives in cities. Do you see a profound disconnect from nature?

There is, and I do feel it when I speak to people. But there’s not one person I’ve met that cannot share these experiences with me. It’s innately in everyone. We just do a really good job of forgetting, and an even better job of creating extremely dynamic, interactive lives around us that are more than we can handle. We don’t need anything else, so we don’t think about anything else. Our lives in the cities are very full. Because we fill them.

We need to bring more nature back into the cities. We can grow vegetables on the walls of buildings, we can put forests on the roofs. We can use our waste products to fertilize urban gardens and even woodlands. We even have computer programs that can help us design these landscapes. There’s so much we can do—it’s just an investment of time and a little bit of brilliance. We are brilliant creatures. Overall, we need to consume less and share more because community means everything.

Some of the people I live with and work with in the Okavango Delta have no education. They see the world completely differently, and speak in a completely different way. Their language is cyclic, very slow and almost hypnotic. We must not forget them. Their lifestyle is the reason we have a green, wonderful planet. Our lifestyles are not manifesting that at all, so we must celebrate them more.

This is the greatest challenge of the global conservation movement going forward: how do you convince billions of people around the world that have no opportunity to even see nature or stars to care enough about it to conserve it? We need to figure out how to make nature part of our daily lives again, no matter where we live.

TED Fellows is a global network of 300 innovators and trailblazers from a wide spectrum of disciplines. Read more about this community and how to become a part of it »


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The Time 100 offers many TED connections

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Time-100-2014Time has given its annual list of the 100 Most Influential People of the Year a twist again for 2014 – each person on the list was written about by someone who could just as easily have appeared on it themselves. Below, the many TED connections in this package, both honorees and writers, divided into the categories Titans, Pioneers, Artists, Leaders and Icons.

Titans

Pioneers

TED2014’s surprise speaker, Edward Snowden (watch his talk), not-too-surprisingly makes the listArunachalam Muruganantham (watch his talk) gets picked thanks to his sanitary pad revolutionAl Gore (watch his latest talk) writes about Tom Steyer of NextGen ClimateJ.J. Abrams (watch his TED talk) shares his love of Alfonso Cuarón, the man behind GravityBrian Greene (watch his talk) writes about John Kovac, whose team identified ripples in space-time consistent with inflationary theoryTED attendee Shonda Rhimes lauds Jenji Kohan, who made Orange Is the New Black (watch a TEDx talk about the book the show is based on)David Agus (watch his talk) writes about David Sinclair, the geneticist working to reverse aging of cells

Artists

Leaders

Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala (watch her talk) is honored for guarding Nigeria’s public funds, and Bono (watch his talk) shares why he is proud to work for herMadeleine Albright (watch her talk) clobbers Vladimir Putin for his decisions regarding UkraineTech investor Esther Dyson (watch her TEDx talk) cheers on Ory Okolloh’s (watch her talk) efforts to rebuild AfricaFormer governor of the Central Bank of Nigeria, Lamido Sanusi (watch his TEDx talk), compliments Thuli Madonsela’s work as public protector of South AfricaWriter Elif Shafak (watch her talk) shares why she believes Turkey’s president Abdullah Gul is at a crossroads

Icons

Charlie Rose (watch his talk) gets honored for his interviewing chops, and is called “a disarming man” by Michael BloombergGabby Giffords (watch her talk) meditates on Malala Yousafzai’s (watch her father’s talk at TED2014) strength and courageMelinda Gates (watch her talk) highlights Christy Turlington Burns’s fight for the health of mothers worldwideAnd finally, T. Boone Pickens (watch his talk) gives unexpected applause for businessman Carl Icahn

—Kate Torgovnick and Becky Chung


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What Is Your Greatest Achievement?

My 25-year high school reunion is next month. I’ll probably go. My best friend from high school intends to go (we’ve been friends for almost 30 years now), and it will be fun to catch up with other old friends.

There can be some amusement at a high school reunion as you see that everyone has grown fatter, balder, and more married. The jock is now an insurance salesperson with two kids. The star of the school play now manages a restaurant. That sort of thing…

When I reflect back on what I’ve learned in the past 25 years since graduating high school, I ask myself what accomplishments I appreciate most. I’m not interested in showing off to my peers. I simply wonder how I’d answer this for myself.

My high school self was a straight-A student, graduating with top honors, excited about going to college, and following the path that society had laid out for him. I was expected to continue along that path. I excelled in school partly because my goals aligned with other people’s expectations. I had little social resistance and plenty of social support for most of what I wanted to do. Nobody tried to talk me out of pursuing a computer science degree.

The real tests came when I wanted to do something that other people didn’t agree with, such as starting my own business or going vegetarian. For whatever reason, those types of tests came up often for me.

Because of the path I followed since high school, I strengthened my independent will. Today I’m able to follow my conscience and make decisions based on my character, beliefs, thoughts, and feelings on a matter, and not be overly dissuaded from my course even if many people around me disagree. I’m capable of following my path with a heart in ways that would surprise my high school self.

Back in high school, it was a big deal for me to share with a few close friends that I didn’t believe in the whole Christian god story anymore. Now I find it much easier to share my thoughts and feelings openly regardless of how people may react. Religion is spiritual immaturity, the fool’s path of growth. If people feel a need to go kittywompus when they hear me say that, I let them go kittywompus.

Today I take better advantage of my freedom than my high school self ever did. He felt very constrained, but he still honored most of the constraints that other people placed around him. I’ve since lost respect for externally imposed constraints. I do value constraints, but only if they align with my values. If I don’t agree with other people’s rules or conventions, I largely ignore them. I still consider predictable consequences, but I don’t follow rules merely for the sake of following rules. I think for myself and make decisions based on what I think is right, regardless of what the standard procedure is supposed to be.

If I hadn’t been able to develop my independent will, I wouldn’t have been able to go vegan. I wouldn’t have been able to leave an unfulfilling marriage. I wouldn’t have started two businesses. I wouldn’t be blogging or speaking publicly. I wouldn’t have given away the copyrights to my work.

Often when I talk to people my own age, I find it hard to relate to them. So many of my peers seem overly scared… so fearful of taking risks. They’re afraid to lose what they have, but the irony is that they don’t even appreciate what they have. Most of the time their fear isn’t about taking on risks for themselves. Quite often they’re willing and able to do that. Their greater fear is dealing with people’s judgments of them, especially if they fail to achieve their goals quickly.

What if I fail and my family thinks I’m a loser?

So they’ll think you’re a loser. That doesn’t even matter. You have no obligation to impress them. Follow your path. Let them do the same. If you fail, then fail with style, and take pride in that. Then get up and try again. Stop making failure into this big scary beast. It’s just a road bump. There will be lots of road bumps in your life if you want to do anything remotely interesting.

What if I fail and my spouse leaves me?

Then s/he wasn’t much of a spouse to begin with. This will be a good test to see if you chose someone who can handle you being you. If not, good riddance. You’ll find a better match afterwards. If you want to develop your courage, and you marry someone who’s afraid of that, don’t expect that marriage to last.

What if I lose all my money?

Then you’ll have no money. You can start fresh and earn more. The game doesn’t end just because your gold gets low. The point of the game is to grow, not to acquire gold. If you get on an interesting path of growth, you may very well lose all your money, perhaps multiple times. You may as well get used to it.

These are the kinds of fears that hold people back so much in life.

I’m relieved that I didn’t turn out that way, that I embraced a path of experimentation and failure — and that I find pleasure and meaning in decisions that don’t always turn out well.

I feel good about how far I’ve come since high school, but that feeling isn’t due to external accomplishments that might impress anyone else. I feel good about becoming a man who can act in alignment with his conscience, even when everyone else disagrees.

I don’t eat animal products. I consider it unethical.

I don’t have a regular job. Doing repetitive work for pay seems like a waste of life. It’s not worth the reduction in freedom.

I give away most of my creative work for free (and uncopyrighted), so anyone can share it easily. That feels good to me.

My thoughts, feelings, and behaviors aren’t that unusual. Many people feel the same as I do about these subjects. They agree that it would be more ethical to drop animal products. They’d rather not spend years of their life working for someone else. And they like the idea of expressing their creativity and contributing. The difference is that they let their fears about other people’s reactions stop them from making a bigger push in those directions.

I feel very fortunate that something inside me popped and said, “Nope, can’t live like that.”

In reflecting back on the past 25 years, the achievement I’m most proud of was to become a man who finds it unnecessary to satisfy others’ expectations of him. That gave me the freedom to create a life that I enjoy and appreciate.

I also look forward to the possibility that another 25 years from now, my future self may look back once again and reflect upon how much he’s grown. I cannot know what he’ll be like, but I can predict that his path would surprise me. I like that.

What’s your greatest life achievement thus far? What accomplishments do you appreciate the most? Would you name one of your public wins? Or one of your private victories?


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Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Webby Award nominations: Vote for TED, and find hundreds more sites to explore

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The 2014 Webby Award nominations were announced this week, and one particular nomination stood out. Because once again, in the Online Film & Video: Variety category, TED is pitted against Kid President. And once again, we’re so conflicted.

If you are too, vote for TED where you can; we’ll understand. Here are all of TED’s nominations in the People’s Voice ballot. Sign in to vote in support of TED.com, TED-Ed or one of the other amazing nominees:

TED.com is nominated in Social: Education & Discovery and in Online Film & Video: Events & Live Webcasts, as well as the hotly contested Online Film & Video: Variety.

Our app is nominated in Mobile & Apps: Education & Reference, and the  iTunes audio podcast series is nominated in Mobile & Apps: Podcasts.

Meanwhile, TED-Ed is up for the Web: Education category.

Voting is open until April 24, and winners will be announced April 29.

Bonus: As you go to each page to cast your vote, scroll down to the “Honorees” listing as well, for even more amazing websites, apps and social campaigns to explore.


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The Tim Ferriss Podcast is Live! Here Are Episodes 1 and 2

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Fuckin’ A–it’s finally here!

After fantasizing about starting a podcast for nearly two years, after being asked hundreds of times, The Tim Ferriss Show is now live.

Sometimes you have to stop over-thinking things, bite the bullet, and figure it out as you go.

To launch, I’ve posted two episodes that are vastly different.  They are available on iTunes and, for Android folks, Stitcher.

I have an important favor to ask, which I don’t do often:

1) Please listen to one or both episodes.
2) Then, PLEASE leave a review on iTunes.

I will read EVERY review and, based on that feedback, I’ll either stop or keep doing this podcast.

If you seem to like them, I promise to do at least 6 total episodes in the next 1-2 months.  And trust me: I have some amazing people lined up and ready to go. Constructive criticism and suggestions for improvement are welcome, whether on iTunes or in the comments below.

All that said, here are the first two episodes! I really hope you enjoy them.

EPISODE 1: KEVIN ROSE

I consider Kevin Rose one of the best “stock pickers” in the startup world. He can predict even non-tech trends with stunning accuracy…

Kevin is a tech entrepreneur who co-founded Digg, Revision3 (sold to Discovery Channel), Pownce, and Milk (sold to Google). Since 2012, he is a venture partner at Google Ventures. He’s also a hilarious dude, and this episode involves heavy drinking.

In this finding-my-feet episode, Kevin and I get down on a bottle of Gamling and McDuck while discussing, among dozens of topics: why Kevin would love to work at McDonald’s, how he kicked my ass on the Twitter deal, and — just a wee tad — biohacking.

Dive in, folks!

It’s the first episode of The Tim Ferriss Show!  Listen to it here, and please subscribe!

EPISODE 2: JOSH WAITZKIN

Josh Waitzkin was the basis for the book and movie Searching for Bobby Fischer.

Considered a chess prodigy, he has perfected learning strategies that can be applied to anything, including his other loves of Brazilian jiu-jitsu (he’s a black belt under phenom Marcelo Garcia) and Tai Chi Push Hands (he’s a world champion). These days, he spends his time coaching the world’s top performers, whether Mark Messier, Cal Ripken Jr., or hedgefund managers.  I initially met Josh through his incredible book, The Art of Learning, which I loved so much that I helped produce the audiobook (download here, at Audible or DRM-free Gumroad).

This episode is DEEP, in the best way possible.  Josh will blow your mind.

And for a change from Episode 1, I’m totally sober.  I’d be curious to know which Tim you prefer.

Listen to it here, and please subscribe!

Special thanks to my friend Ian for helping with show notes. Much obliged, kind sir.

These notes only partially cover the conversations, but they will give you a taste.

EPISODE 1: KEVIN ROSE

What makes a good wine bar?The story of Kevin Rose: Growing up in Vegas, starting Digg, joining Google Ventures, and beyondWhat makes Kevin Rose so good at predicting what’s next, spotting trendsThe characteristics of winners. What makes a successful angel investor?Hear the story of Odeo – The company that birthed TwitterTips on choosing angel investments

“What new app will find itself on the front screen of your iPhone?”

Dissecting the success of Philip Rosedale, Elon Musk and — the “Oracle of Silicon Valley” — Reid HoffmanHow to say no to an investment or pitchExperiences and lessons learned running the roller coaster of DiggWhere is Kevin Rose world-class?  Which skills define his success?The M7 chip on iPhone – An opportunity to build new appsLearn more about My Basis, a biometric company that Tim invested in [Update: sold to Intuit for $100M]Why Kevin wants to get a job at McDonald’sIdeas and suggestions for the podcast. Where should it go, and how should it be different?

SOME LINKS FROM EPISODE 1

Connect with Kevin Rose: Instagram | Twitter | Website

EPISODE 2: JOSH WAITZKIN

The origins of The Art of Learning.What it takes to play 30-50 games of chess simultaneously (!).About Josh’s focus on moving from world-class to world champion. How to cross the gap between the twoThe many dimensions of Josh Waitzkin’s creative life:FamilyJW Foundation – The Art of Learning ProjectBrazilian Jiu-Jitsu (BJJ) school with Marcelo GarciaConsulting for “Master of the Universe”-type financiers; what commonalities the best haveAbout the learning (and UNlearning) processes that distinguish the good from the great and from the eliteInsights on the strategic movement from Tai Chi to BJJAbout the profound kinesthetic intelligence of Marcelo Garcia and how he uses it to “navigate the world”A deep understanding of what makes world-class performers tick and thrive

“If you can really train people to get systematic about nurturing their creative process, it’s unbelievable what can happen. Most of that work relates to getting out of your own way at a very high level. It’s unlearning, it’s the constant practice of subtraction, reducing friction.” – Josh Waitzkin

Strategies for aligning peak energy periods with peak creativity to achieve a relentless, proactive lifestyleOn Hemingway’s creative writing process:End the workday with something left to writeRelease your mind from the work – Let GoUnderstanding cognitive biasesUnderstanding how to use specific questions for deconstruction (e.g. “Who’s good at this who shouldn’t be?”)Core themes/habits that Josh teaches to top performers:

Meditation | Journaling | “Undulation” (Capacity to turn drive on and off)

How Josh Waitzkin meditatesMeditation styles: contemplative Buddhist sitting meditation, Tai Chi and moving meditation.What Josh’s morning rituals look likeWhy you should study the artists rather than the art critics.Remember to love.

“The hero and the coward both feel the same thing, but the hero uses his fear and projects it onto his opponent, while the coward runs.” – Cus D’Amato, original trainer of Mike Tyson

“One of the things we have to be wary in life is studying the people who study the artists, as opposed to the artists themselves” – Josh Waitzkin

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Love Notes

My family leaves little unintentional loves notes for me all over the place.

I’m a bit of a neat freak — I like things decluttered and clean. And so when people in my house leave things around (which happens when you have lots of kids, naturally), I catch myself getting a little frustrated.

“Why can’t they clean up after themselves?” I’ll catch myself thinking. I know this is a self-centered thought, so when I’m mindful, I can just watch the thought arise and then let it pass peacefully by.

I’m not proud of it, but other times I don’t notice the selfishness and it can get me irritated. Lately I’ve discovered a mental trick that I really love: I see the things my family leaves around as little love notes for me.

My daughter leaves her legos all over the living room? A love note for me — yay! My son left his cookie crumbs all over the counter? Another love note — amazing! I can pick up after them gratefully, or give them a hug of thanks and ask them to clean up.

The legos can be seen as frustrating, because why don’t they clean up, or I can see them as the physical manifestation of my daughter’s personality, the things she’s passionate about, the playfulness in her heart. And I can realize that if she weren’t living with me, yes I’d have a lovely neat nevermessy home … but then she wouldn’t be in my life.

So now I see the legos as a reminder that I have this beautiful person in my life. A love note, unintented unexpected unendurably full of love.


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5 Expert Tips To Help You Master 90% Of Your Body Language

I am pretty sure you have already heard the typical expression – almost 93% of our communication is non-verbal. That what you say doesn’t really matter. That what others perceive is actually defined by a combination of our body language, tonality and eye contact, rather than the actual words we use.

When I first heard this idea it blew my mind. I was always trying to focus on what to say and how to make it sound as fancy as possible, but in reality it was not that important. This applies to every human interaction ranging from talking in business meetings and giving presentations, to having a laugh with friends or trying to seduce a girl you like.

It is common knowledge that people who use their body language effectively come across as more:

PowerfulDominantTrustfulSuperiorAttractive

And these are only some of the few traits of people who know how to use their body language.

Despite its importance, the great majority of the population neglects non-verbal communication. And the main reason behind this is that it takes much time and effort to master the science of body language. Luckily enough for you, I have been around body language experts my whole life and I am proud to present the five most significant tips they have given to me in order to master almost 90% of your body language.

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If you get the chance to examine world leaders, you will find out at most of their meetings and social appearances, they tend to follow a similar pattern.

They take big steps. Big steps are a sign of strength and leadership whereas small steps usually convey weakness.They keep a straight posture. A straight posture communicates confidence and superiority and people usually feel protected when they are around you.They never look down. Looking down as you walk is a sign of insecurity and most people lose trust in your abilities if you don’t keep a strong straight look while you walk.

Walking like a leader unconsciously puts you in a position of one. Others around you feel this shift in your identity and you become more respected, more trustful and more attractive.

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Yes you know what I am talking about. That look you take whenever you look at yourself in the mirror and no one is around. A great majority of the people I know, agree this is their most attractive look but because of insecurity they fail to adopt it on a regular basis.

Most of the greatest body language experts I know have told me they have trained themselves to adopt this look. Every time they were looking at themselves in the mirror, they were trying to find their seductive face. After that they would take a virtual image of it and they would try to make this image an integral part of their face.

They were consistent and conscious about it and they managed to make their seductive face their competitive advantage.

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Micro-expressions can be quite confusing. Experts reveal micro-expressions can betray your intentions and even destroy your image in a fraction of a second. They argue that the best way to eliminate them is to keep a stable, rock-solid face whenever you talk. In order to achieve this, they propose an exercise with a mirror again. The exercise goes like this:

Look at yourself in the mirror but this time start talking. Now, while you talk, focus on weird micro-expressions your face adopts while saying specific words or going through a specific emotional state. Now say the same words or sentence again, while trying to keep a rock-solid, stable, face. If you do this exercise for 15 minutes a day you will be able to reduce micro-expressions within a week.

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A deep voice is one of the most powerful attributes of an alpha male. It is an indicator of dominant masculine polarity and a major attraction switch.

A deep voice might be something difficult to master. Mainly because in the beginning – especially if you have a high-pitched voice – changing your voice can make you sound like Tony Robbins. However the truth is that it actually works.

You will start getting compliments from girls and people will start paying a lot more attention to what you say. Again, the secret to mastering a deep voice is to be conscious about it. Pay deep attention to it every time you are in a conversation with somebody. Deepen your tonality whenever you feel it sounds weak.

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In order to improve your eye contact and make yourself comfortable with that, you need to challenge yourself. You need to keep strong eye contact with every single person you may be conversing with. Even if it is Kate Upton!

Start with your friends so it is easy and continue with strangers. But you need to be conscious about it. It is not as difficult and as awkward as you may think. After a small period of time, you will get used to it and you will become unconsciously good at it.

Featured photo credit: flirting/Joris Louwes via flickr.com

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Andrian is an entrepreneur, blogger and seduction coach. His motto is - knowledge never ends and the more we know, the more we can redefine our reality in the most creative way. Seduction is the art he fell in love with and he strongly believes that every man hides a great seducer inside. In his blog, he aims to inspire men become great Seducers, great Leaders, great Boyfriends, great Men.


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