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Saturday, December 25, 2010

Stepsiblings on the holiday-Cinderella's coal filled stocking

Do you have clients who dislike  spending Christmas with stepsiblings ? Maybe you’re doing this yourself . Are you- or clients-  dreading celebrating the  holidays with a remote, remade family .
During midlife in the twenty-first century, we frequently get divorced and remarried, but lots of  our  parents did before us. In the family dissolution, we may have  acquired stepsiblings as young kids .
On top of that we may have gained unexpected stepsiblings through a parent’s unforeseen late-life marriage.
Those  late-life unions can be a  brand new rash of stepsiblings, introduced in your middle age. You do not have to share your bedroom with them, as stepsiblings must in childhood, but you may be forced to interact through the exploding family web.

When you and your old or new step-siblings see each other at  this month’s family holiday feats, you might plan to do your best to avoid your non blood brother or sister. You may  have been thinking you should do something about the negativity but are unsure what.
Remember it is a ritual event not a therapy session –
Be the peanut butter and not the oozing blood red jelly. If you’ve have unhealed family issues , make a future date to work them out. Spewing your pent-up feelings during the holiday dinner is not the best way move towards forgiveness .Stay with the yuletide spirit make a future date to deal with your step sibling issues.
What you can do is consider  forgiveness as a New Year’s  goal . Watch my You Tube series on siblings, Mom Loves You Best http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cXfoQcR5y3c and help move towards that healing  aspiration.


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